Love it or hate it, Jeremy Clarkson is a British pop-culture hero. His outrageous comments on the facets of daily life in the wet and windy United Kingdom – and the many people on its roads – speak truths far beyond the understanding of the common people.

There are some things he likes, but there are many more things he hates. And what he hates, he really hates. We’ve gathered some of the best quotes (read: rants) from his years on Top Gear for your reading pleasure…

When he talked about the comfort of the CCX – “Koenigsegg are saying that the CCX is more comfortable. More comfortable than what… BEING STABBED?”


When he talked about TVR’s thrilled customers – “In the olden days I always got the impression that TVR built a car, put it on sale, and then found out how it handled – usually when one of their customers wrote to the factory complaining about how dead he was.”


That time a car ran on mouse-power – “Now what you get under the bonnet of this car is not an engine. You get a little field mouse named Gerald.”


The time the mouse turned out to be a bear – “Owning a TVR in the past was like owning a bear. I mean it was great, until it pulled your head off, which it would.”


Why Hemel Hempstead should be blamed for everything – “Now the best gas guzzler of the year. And the nominations are: the Range Rover Sport which achieved eight miles to the gallon; the Bugatti Veyron which achieved four miles to the gallon; and Hemel Hempstead. That actually used up 60 million gallons of fuel and didn’t move an inch.”


This is a bit strong. They have at least 3 friends each. I checked. – “M3 drivers have no friends.”


One of the many time he disagreed with public transport – “I don’t understand bus lanes. Why do poor people have to get to places quicker than I do?”


The time he had butterflies in his tummy. Or was that something else? – “This car was so exciting, I actually needed windscreen wipers on the inside.”


Have we left out any of your favourite quotes? Let us know in the comments, or leave us a message on our Facebook page or Tweet us. See more car quotes on our Pinterest board!

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